Get fit!

I hear these questions all the time:

"HOW DO I GAIN MASS ON X BODYPART??"

"I'M A SKINNY BASTARD AND I WANT TO GET BIGGER."

etc, etc, etc.

Here's the deal. Follow the steps, and get big.

1. Weigh yourself (in lbs !! - if you're a skinny bastard, bf% is irrelevant)
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2. Use these ratios to set up your diet: EAT THIS AMOUNT OF CALORIES EVERY DAY WHETHER YOU LIFT OR NOT

Protein: 1.3-1.5g / # of body weight
Carbs: 2-3g/ # of body weight
Fat .33 - .5g / # of body weight

Notes:
Carb sources: Whole wheat bread, pasta, rice, potatoes, oatmeal, green vegetables, dextrose

Protein: whey powder, eggs, lean meats, fish, skim milk, lowfat cottage cheese

Fat: you'll probably get enough from the meats/eggs you eat, but supplement 1 TABLESPOON of FLAX OIL
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3. at least 1/3 of your total daily calories should come in the 3hour window following your weightlifting workout.

Note: Keep fat intake to a minimum during this time. Whey protein is the desired protein source too due to its fast absorption by the body.

example:
Immediately post workout.
2 scoops whey
1 serving creatine transport + additional dextrose

1 hour post workout
2 scoops whey
2 potatoes

2 hours post workout
MRP
1 potato

3 hours post workout
regular meal (meats, eggs, etc..)
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4. Limit training to 4x a week tops

5. Each body part is trained once a week. The following are the max sets you should be doing a week. per body part.

Chest: no more than 10 work sets
Back: 10 sets
Legs: 10 sets
Bis: 4-6 sets
Tris: 5- 7 sets
Delts: 4-6 sets
Traps: 4 sets
Calves, Abs, Forearms (can be done 2x week - 6-10 sets)
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6. Train heavy - if you can do more than 8 reps it's too light, if you can't do 4 reps with good form it's too heavy.
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7. No isolation movements. Use heavy, basic, compound movements

Chest: Pressing movements (barbell or dumbbells), Flyes w/ DB
Back: Heavy Rows, T-Bars, Pull Ups, Pulldowns, Deadlifts
Legs: Squats, Leg Press, Stiff Leg Deads, Leg Curls
Bis: Barbell Curls, Alt DB Curls
Tris: Close Grip Bench, Skullcrushers, Tri Pressdowns, Dips
Delts: Military Press, DB Presses, DB Raises
Traps: Barbell/ DB Shrugs, Power Cleans
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8. Little if any machine movements.

Chest: no machines
Back: Hammer Machines, and Lat Pulldowns, Seated Rows are OK
Legs: Leg Press, Leg Curl OK
Bis: no machines
Tris: Cable Pressdowns OK
Delts: No machines
Traps: no machines
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9. Drink lots of water - at least a gallon a day

10. Supplement properly
Vit. C, E, Creatine, Glutamine, and CLA are all you need.

11. Get at least 8 hours of sleep a day

12. ABSOLUTELY NO FVCKING CARDIO
(unless you start getting a visible fat roll.. if this happens, just start cutting from the carb totals - that should keep you lean )
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13. Change your routine every 4 weeks, but keep the rep range and exercises constant. Basically, change the order of exercises around to keep the workouts fresh.
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14. Buy a little notebook and track your reps and sets.. each week try to do more weight and more reps. Once you hit the 8 reps you know it's time to up the weight.
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15. After 8 weeks, TAKE ONE FULL WEEK OFF THE GYM. This will recharge your body and keep you from overtraining.

When you come back to the gym, work for that FIRST WEEK ONLY in the 10-12 rep range to get your body used to the weight again. Then jump into another 8 week cycle using your maxes from the last 8 week cycle as your starting point.
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there you have it, now get to work!